Wednesday, October 17, 2007

Warning: Transparency Ahead

"authentic self" ...I came across this phrase in one of my favorite science magazines, SEED, yesterday. It instantly captured my thoughts and imagination as I began to ponder what "authentic self" really means. I asked myself two things; what is "authentic self" and how do we recognize it? I then proceeded to ask the person I was in the middle of a going nowhere texting conversation with the first question. He either a.) had no idea b.) was way to crazy busy to put to much thought into it or c.) didn't really want to chat with me anyway. A rather large part of me wants to guess c, but for the sake of optimism, positive thinking, and whatever else you may want to call it I'm going to go with b. Anyway, who or what is my authentic self? Is the quiet nerdy girl with the thick glasses that wants to bury her nose in her science magazines, large philosophical tomes, and research on Creation me? Or is it the crazy silly story-telling never stops singing annoys the tar out of people extrovert that is me? The dream driven impatient at times overachieving information junkie? Confident comfortable with who I am low-maintenance fashionista? Or the chubby little girl with braces, glasses, and who is always on a diet? Or is my authentic self a culmination of these things? Do all of these seemingly unrelated parts of me make up who I really am or are each of these a different facade that hides true self? Authenticity is defined in several ways, but the explanation that really spoke to me is as follows...entitled to acceptance or belief because of agreement with known facts or experience; reliable; trustworthy. So, if you're still reading at this point follow me on this rapidly decelerating train of thought....Is it maybe that others can only see my authentic self? From the facts that they know about me and/or the experiences they have had in relation to me can my authentic self be seen? Or is it just an "authentic" version of me? So many questions and not even sure if they really lead to an answer or if the point is in the asking.....

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